Dear Olive Branch, January 2024

A P.E.A.C.E. Perspective on Practical Problems

Topic: Listening is a GIFT, and to be heard is empowering

All of this month’s stories have listening to others as a main component. With “Peace Table” we are giving children strategies to be better able to manage relationships by listening to each other. With “Children as Storytellers” we are giving children ways to use language and experience being authors and illustrators. When children want to hear their classmate’s stories, the writers are empowered. “Power to the Parents” demonstrates how when parents are listened to, they are empowered to be able to tell their story.

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Peace Table

Children’s Peace Camp in Orange County, California, is an opportunity for children to learn many concepts and skills about building peace including conflict management. The values of respect, inclusion, compassion, and fairness, among others, support the skills of listening, sharing, and problem solving. The Peace Table is a very concrete place that children can go to work out their differences.

Prior to introducing the Peace Table, the children learn the problem-solving model. We don’t call it that, but when it is obvious to the adults that the children are having some troubles with sharing or some other situation, the adult may quietly move nearer to the children and if the children appear not to be able to manage the situation without some facilitation, the adult will step in stating, “Looks like you may have a problem here.”

The children are then taken through the steps of problem-solving that include: identifying the feelings, describing the problem, creating solutions, deciding upon which idea to try, and finally evaluating how the idea worked. Obviously, there is lots of room for flexibility within this model, but this is the basic structure in which the adult guides the children. This is the process that the children use when they sit down at the Peace Table to manage a conflict. At Peace Camp this is the model that the adults learn so that when they are working with the children they are able to facilitate problem-solving.

One year at camp we had a delightful mother and her seven-year-old son both attending, the mother as one of our volunteers. The child, let’s call him Billy, enjoyed being with the other children and was a natural-born mediator. He loved the Peace Table, often supporting other children in the use.

After the Peace Camp week was over, his mother called us to tell us that the evening before, the children in the neighborhood were playing and got into a disagreement. They were yelling at each other when Billy told them they all needed to use the Peace Table. Well… they had no idea what he was talking about since they had not attended Peace Camp. Luckily, Billy’s mom heard what was going on, saw that Billy was in over his head, and came outside to help. With her facilitation, Billy was able to explain the Peace Table to the children and then they set up one on a big rock in the yard and proceeded to manage the conflict. Billy’s mom was essential to the process of Billy bringing the Peace Table to his neighborhood!

— S. Hopkins

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Children as Storytellers

“Teacher Joyce, I have a story!” “Great! Let’s find your journal. You tell me the words and I’ll write them; then you can draw a picture that goes with the story if you like.” Either I or one of the parents would write the story — sometimes just a few words, sometimes more. Once the story was completed, children put their journals that contained the story on the story chair — a rocking chair where I sat to read stories each day.

At the end of the day I read their stories — “This story was written and illustrated by…,” along with a book that I chose to read to them. There were usually about 3 or 4 child-written stories each day, and they all listened attentively to each other’s creations.

For a while, one year the stories were about the teacher getting locked in a closet and all the many ways she was able to get out! Another year a child who began the year as an English language learner wrote a beautiful story about a child in the clouds — the best thing was that, after I read Priya’s story, the children asked me to read it again!

Children became empowered storytellers, and at the end of the year they could take their journals home, read the stories again and maybe even create new ones.

— J. Daniels

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Power to the Parents

I was asked by a parent if I would be the advocate for her child at an IEP meeting for her child. I spent some time talking to the parents about the child and the parents told me what their child needed and I made a few suggestions.

The child was born with part of her brain missing, and had scoliosis. From what the parents told me, is that they had asked for some accommodations for their child from the school, and the school was not listening.

To get ready for the meeting, I requested the school that I would like to come and observe in the child’s classroom so that I could see what accommodations the child might need. I was reluctantly given permission, and went to the school. I was escorted to the child’s classroom and my escort stayed with me.

I noticed that the teacher had covered the clock. It was silent reading time, a little while before lunch. The teacher took a small kitchen timer and set it for 15 minutes so that the children could do independent reading in this first grade classroom. All was well for a few minutes, then all of the children started to get antsy. They didn’t know how much longer they needed to read. I noticed that the child I was watching was out of her seat several times, and the teacher kept reminding her to read her book. Eventually the timer went off. And the teacher had the children line up, with my focus child standing in her place by the teacher’s desk, and of course, she started playing with the tape dispenser on her desk.

The parents told the school that I would be at the IEP meeting the next week as the child’s advocate, and the parents had to document the information that gave me permission to attend. Meanwhile, I discovered the school had searched my credentials.

The next week, the IEP meeting commenced. I signed in as “other” and wrote “advocate”. I introduced myself. I had expected the teacher, the special education teacher and the principal. I was surprised. All of the IEP team was there. I yielded my turn to talk to the parents. They were quite capable of stating what their child needed. At the end of the meeting, specific testing was assigned. The parents thanked me for supporting them, and they said that the meeting was amazing, they were listened to for the first time by the school, and they felt that the child’s needs would be accommodated. And I found out later that the child was doing much better, in a follow up phone call. All it took was for me, as a professional with the right credentials, to be at the meeting. The parents were the ones who made the case and won.

— D. Satterlee

NOTE: We chose “Dear Olive Branch” as the title for this column for several reasons — foremost as a sign of peace. Also, olives come in many colors, sizes, tastes, uses — a sign of diversity just as there are many types of questions and those who send the questions. We hope “Olive’s” responses will help you, the reader. If you have a question for Olive use our contact form.